broternia: i was just out taking a walk and some woman slowly stopped her car next to me and she was all like “excuse me” and i was freakin out like oh my god she’s going to kill me or ask for directions or something, my life is over, and she was like “take this” and she handed me a 10 dollar bill and she was like “get yourself a haircut so you can get a job you fucking hippie” i’m laaughing so...
lady-sherlock: thatinvinciblekid: ...
potential-and-difference: prop-215: dazegetbrighter: what if rocks are actually soft but just tense up when we touch them? How stoned are you right now? Was that a fucking pun?
thisgingerisback: Angelina Jolie announces a double mastectomy to save her life, people get fucking pissed and act like she’s lost everything that’s made her worthwhile in the first place, AND YOU WONDER WHY I FUCKING HATE THE “SAVE THE BOOBIES” TROPE. BECAUSE NO ONE ACTUALLY GIVES A FUCK ABOUT THE WOMAN’S LIFE. WOMEN JUST HAPPEN TO BE ATTACHED TO A PAIR OF BREASTS. WOMEN AREN’T WORTH...
tickettoheaven: chafing-nipples: dangermat: when bananas rot they secrete stuff that makes other fruit including bananas near them rot faster that’s so fucked up that is murder suicide bananas commit murder suicide that’s pretty fucking metal I’d say it’s pretty fucking bananas
adventuresonpaper: I’ll come back for you i whisper as i caress the video games i can’t afford
booksandwildthings: riceballhika: if I was an actor in something popular, I’d go to cons cosplaying that character except I’d get a really shitty party wig and sew a terrible outfit out of costume satin and then if I got called out on how terrible my cosplay was I’d rip off the wig and tearaway cosplay, revealing my real hair and outfit underneath and be like “I AM THAT CHARACTER”
shade-shypervert: askstrikertheskeletonhunter: What if the real world could lag
muffin-bitch: katnissandhermione: i just realised there are more nipples in the world than there are people what the fuck you’re right